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"Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth." -- Muhammad Ali, Boxer
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對許多人來說,寫離職聲明並不容易,但換句話說,這也可能是一個說真話的時機。一個基金管理人Andrew Lahde曾寫了一封辭職信並投稿到Financial Times,掀起軒然大波。在他狂妄的辭職信中,大大諷刺了所有在2008年金融海嘯失利的投機客,其中不乏美國菁英、知名投資者、政客…

而他,Andrew Lahde,則因為看準時機乘風而起、急流湧退,大賺上億美金。這大概是一封全世界最糟糕的公開辭職信,但也一語道破了政府體制的失靈,金融市場的貪婪,句句直指核心,讓人讀來又忌妒又爽快。

 

 

Dear Investors, Today I write not to gloat. Given the pain that nearly everyone is experiencing, that would be entirely inappropriate. Nor am I writing to make further predictions, as most of my forecasts in previous letters have unfolded or are in the process of unfolding. Instead, I am writing to say goodbye.

gloat 幸災樂禍
say goodbye 這封信的刊出時間是2008.10.17,金融海嘯才剛剛開始,Lahde已經將對沖基金全數脫手。

 

Recently, on the front page of Section C of the Wall Street Journal, a hedge fund manager who was also closing up shop (a $300 million fund), was quoted as saying, “What I have learned about the hedge fund business is that I hate it.” I could not agree more with that statement. I was in this game for the money. The low hanging fruit, i.e. idiots whose parents paid for prep school, Yale, and then the Harvard MBA, was there for the taking. These people who were (often) truly not worthy of the education they received (or supposedly received) rose to the top of companies such as AIG, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers and all levels of our government. All of this behavior supporting the Aristocracy only ended up making it easier for me to find people stupid enough to take the other side of my trades. God bless America.

“What I have learned about the hedge fund business is that I hate it.”
這句話應該出自於2008年的Mr. Sellers,前股票分析師,經營一間位於芝加哥的基金公司。

 

...I will no longer manage money for other people or institutions. I have enough of my own wealth to manage. Some people, who think they have arrived at a reasonable estimate of my net worth, might be surprised that I would call it quits with such a small war chest. That is fine; I am content with my rewards. Moreover, I will let others try to amass nine, ten or eleven figure net worths. Meanwhile, their lives suck. Appointments back to back, booked solid for the next three months, they look forward to their two week vacation in January during which they will likely be glued to their Blackberries or other such devices.

a small war chest 戰爭基金,廣義上用來指為達成某個目的預留的財產。Lahde在這裡強調曾有人訝異他賺到這裡就收手。 
amass  收集、累積
Meanwhile, their lives suck Lahde嘲笑這些汲汲營營於「賺錢」的人,他們的人生「爛透了」。 

What is the point? They will all be forgotten in fifty years anyway. Steve Balmer, Steven Cohen, and Larry Ellison will all be forgotten. I do not understand the legacy thing. Nearly everyone will be forgotten. Give up on leaving your mark. Throw the Blackberry away and enjoy life.

Steve Balmer 微軟前任CEO,2014年卸任
Steven Cohen 知名避險基金管理人,他的公司SAC Capital Advisors因內線交易被指控「詐欺」,檢察官稱其為「criminal enterprise」,他的6個員工分別被起訴不同罪名,而Cohen無罪,付了18億美金罰款,2014年起被禁止交易,2017年他創辦Point72 Asset Management LP,準備東山再起。
Larry Ellison 全球大型資料庫廠商甲骨文(Oracle)創辦人

 

…On the issue of the U.S. Government, I would like to make a modest proposal. First, I point out the obvious flaws 缺陷, whereby legislation was repeatedly brought forth to Congress over the past eight years, which would have reigned in 統治、支配 the predatory 掠奪性的  lending practices of now mostly defunct 頹敗的 institutions. These institutions regularly filled the coffers 金庫 of both parties in return for voting down all of this legislation designed to protect the common citizen.

This is an outrage, yet no one seems to know or care about it. Since Thomas Jefferson and Adam Smith 兩位美國開國元勳 passed, I would argue that there has been a dearth 匱乏 of worthy philosophers in this country, at least ones focused on improving government. Capitalism worked for two hundred years, but times change, and systems become corrupt. George Soros, a man of staggering 大得驚人的 wealth, has stated that he would like to be remembered as a philosopher.

這一段是Lahde投書媒體的真正原因。Lahde批評政府有8年時間可以應對金融危機卻毫無作為,兩黨勾結、利益交換,重要的借貸法規始終沒過,他在信中怒吼,自從Thomas Jefferson跟Adam Smith兩位開國元勳後,美國似乎再沒有改革政府的思想家。

 

With that I say goodbye and good luck.

All the best,

Andrew Lahde

 


本文收錄於英語島English Island 2018年5月號
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